Mother's Perspective: New Year’s Resolution or Self-Revolution?
By Denise Solis
Advice Columnist
January 2006

We all try to make things better in the New Year. As they say, out with the old and in with the new, right? It sounds good to our friends and family if we really put forth that effort and promise to lose those extra pounds or cut back on those smokes. But are we truly making a resolution for a new beginning or are we setting the bar a bit too high to actually succeed?

I believe we tend to undermine our own good intentions by making our resolution list too long and too hard. We convince ourselves that we can do these things only to be dashed within the first months, if not sooner. My solution to this problem; set the bar at a reasonable height or even lower to start. That way you won’t set yourself up for a downfall before you have had a chance to get half way.

For example, I would love to lose those holiday pounds. So this year, instead of saying, “Okay, girl, you are going to shed 50 pounds in the next year.” I have set my goal to 5 pounds over the next month. That way if I lose 6 I will be not only tickled pink but healthier to boot!

It is always smarter to take baby steps before giant leaps. Hey, as my son says, “One day at a time.” You cannot undo something in one minute that may have taken you a lifetime to create. Like smoking or gaining weight.

I would imagine trying to quit smoking cold turkey hardly every works. But cutting out even two or three cigarettes the first week of January would be an improvement, especially if you are one of those pack a day types.

The other side to the coin is to always remember to reward yourself when you do reach a goal. If those five pounds come off, treat yourself to something nice, (and I don’t mean chocolate cake) like a manicure or pedicure. Pamper yourself a bit and the sacrifice won’t seem so bad. Much easier to continue through the next five pounds if you have a reward on the horizon, isn’t it?

My husband and I use what we call the “weekly” method. That is to say, we hold fast to our diets from Monday through Friday, and then we splurge on the weekend. Meaning, we really don’t watch what we eat too much. Or we have a piece of cheesecake (and split it). That way we don’t feel so deprived of a treat. Everything in moderation is a good motto. It has worked for us and maybe it will work for you, too.

Exercise is another of my all time favorite resolutions. But I have learned that you cannot walk those five miles from the beginning. Again, the baby steps theory kicks in. You have to start out slow and work up to that goal.
I was doing really well with my daily workout routine until November hit. That was doomsday (or month) for me. I started doing my Christmas shopping and poof…, the treadmill was folded up and out of the way. You know how it goes. The company arrives, you go out to dinner, parties. The healthy diet goes out the window. We all do it. Nothing to be ashamed of, it is just human nature.

But as of January first, I set that treadmill back up and started back on my routine. I do my walking for 30 minutes and use the rest of the time to use free weights and stretch out. That way I can alternate a bit with what goes where, so I don’t get bored and stop. Be creative about whatever you do.

Another one of my resolutions this year was to learn something new. So I enrolled myself in a Life Coach class. I am very excited about it and have already received my books. Now I have a schedule of classes and can plan other things around those dates. I like to keep busy, so filling in those free days with studying and speaking engagements is my thing. And of course, I love writing this column every month, too J

But, what is good for me may not suit you. Maybe learning a second language or other type of skill would be more your forte’. My motto in life has always been, “When I stop learning, put me in the ground.”

I have also decided to start painting again. A hobby I have not done since I was in school. It began with designing some artwork for relatives as Christmas presents. One of them was for my son and he was amazed. He never really knew that I was an artist, of sorts. Other people I gave paintings to had a similar reaction.
So I have continued with that into the new year and hope to take some classes down the road. I enjoy creating visual art as well as verbal.

All in all, I am content with my 2006 so far and hope to complete all of my resolutions as the months go by. I hope you will all do the same. Remember, it is never too late to learn something new or build something beautiful. I truly believe we all have a creative piece inside of us and we need to let it out. Whether it is drawing, writing, painting, sculpting or taking photographs. Make a point to do something nice for yourself. You will thank yourself for it.

We are now more than halfway through January of 2006 and I would say with confidence that most of you have not even started to shift your schedule around to include time for exercise, fun or anything but work. There’s no time like the present! Start today! I have faith in you.